Hello all. Its been a while since my last post and I hope the interval has been kind to you dear reader as it has been to me. Well, I am sure the header of this post must have attracted your attention. In our colorful lives we must have faced some hard ends, some really unfair feedback and some undeserved treatment. Life must have left us hard done by on a few occasions. It is inevitable, but that wisdom is only an afterthought. When we are in the middle of some harsh turns life does beat us. And that dear folks is what this post is all about. But please, make no mistake; this isn’t going to be a dreary, pale, sad, gloomy post fretting out the imbalances in life. What I am endeavoring is, to make light of certain situations, just an effort to make us feel lighter and face unfair criticism better.
There might be a question on my capacity to write on this post. I am sure I have not faced as much as many of my elders would have, but still, yours truly has had some real entertaining situations to face. You know the thing with me friends? Me and trouble are best friends. ‘T’ follows me where ever I go :-). So I guess that’s enough qualification for me:-) Now, dictionary defines Criticism as “A serious examination and judgment of something”. We humans are born critics. It is in our blood to judge others and we call it (conveniently) the ‘Sixth Sense’. We claim the difference between us and an animal is this capacity to judge, review and react accordingly to any situation. But what have we become in the process of judging others? Where has it led us, this habit of being judgmental and critical??
Dear readers, there used to be two separate things, Fair/Constructive criticism and unfair/Destructive criticism. But tell me honestly, do u think the former exists anymore? The word criticism has become synonymous with unfair criticism so much so that there is no longer any that is fair. Being brutally honest, I have been at the end of some real serious lashings. Hardly have my efforts or actions deserved éclat, even when they deserved some. I have always been labeled the verbose, hot headed, radical, impatient young fellow. Every opinion of mine has been criticized in one way or the other, rather harshly by my own peers. I have been pushed to a corner on numerous occasions. But I have always had people to guide me out. Therein lies the key, I believe, to succeed.
My father keeps telling me just one thing, Raghavan when you have talent and skill and when you are right in what you say and do, no one in this world can bottle you or keep you down unless you let them. A wise man’s wise words! But now, the point I was trying to make is that, any criticism or any feedback can affect you only if you let it. Now let me take you all on a different, seemingly un-connected ride. Let us divert from this base that we are journeying on. Let us drive a bike now. Literally and figuratively.
Ever driven fast on a bike between two converging vehicles friends? Preferably two huge buses? Well I hope you will bear with me when I construct a driver’s point of view here. Pulling off a high speed, high risk maneuver such as this is anything but easy. A lot of elements have to come together to do this. First you must be able to listen to your bike. Will the bike be able to get you through? When you do get a positive response from your bike, then your role starts. Zipping through two converging vehicles is unbelievably tough. It requires extreme concentration and judgment. You need to evaluate the speeds of both the vehicles and must decide on the speed in which you have to drive. You need to be in proper positions strategically to pull it off. You ought to be in the perfect gear. One gear stroke less and you could end up crashing to either vehicle; one gear more and you could end up losing valuable thrust and face a farcical ending. So extreme intent, high caution, perfect speed, accurate judgment and a real rush of adrenaline and courage can help you pull off the maneuver that could last a maximum of 5 seconds. In those 5 seconds multiple emotions will shroud you. Fear, thrill, anxiety, excitement and finally a sense of victory.
At the end of this move you will, as a rider smile and will be happy about yourself. But sadly dear reader, your enthusiasm might not be shared by everybody. Take your own parents for instance, I will not bet too much on any parent vouching for this move. You might have done a tremendous job, but then your parents will definitely reprimand you on this.
This ladies and Gentleman is what we call criticism. Unfair criticism! What seems right to us may not always be right. What gave us real thrill and what makes us feel commoved might in all probability make others upset. And you ultimately end up receiving some flak for actually having done something really well. Ironical??
Well I hope u have gotten a point here. If you had read between the lines I have sub consciously left a message above. For those who didn’t get me, well all that I am trying to communicate is this; there is no right way or method to face criticisms. No perfect key to unlock it. There is just one thing we must remember when facing some serious critic, What might have been a job well done might not have been the same to others. But that really doesn’t mean u should worry. Critics are like air, they will exist forever. Worrying about them or their seemingly unfair feedback will take you nowhere. You need to be able to understand a coin always has two sides.
Kind of getting preachy amn’t i? Well, I guess I have just about managed to communicate something across. Might not have been something that none of us know, but then certain universally known messages are worth bringing to the fore often. My aim is just to make an endeavor, to print something on my reader’s mind that he can carry on for a little while. Who knows, maybe the next time you do face a bad critic you might remember this post :-)
PS : I asked my colleague to do some proof reading, know what feedback I got?? “Rags, there is just too much of the word ‘criticism’ in this post. And I think this is not such a good post, its too lengthy too.....don post it…
Well….. I have posted this afterall... somebody said something on not worrying too much about criticisms?? :-)